Twin flames

what is a twin flame exactly? Is there a true definition of a twin flame. I for once thought i had this one figured out and it was something between the two energies within ones own being that gives and receives the pleasure from above and below meeting at the convergence of the heart, or middle mind. We have three minds with in-- the mind of the crown or head and the heart, and the genitals --- yet man wants to make man in their image and likeness instead of in Gods image and likeness. One has to ask themselves are we the fallen angels, as in scripture it speaks us being restored and no husband or wife per se as angels do not have sex for procreation.. Pride, the self centeredness of raising the ego, which even seems to be done in ministry these days- a physical and psychological pride. Our true Father is about giving , and as such we receive to be a blessing to to give back, to the Creator and to each other-- yet what does this mean? Am I expected to lay with all my friends to give such? Love in its purest form is not to conquer a person, but to let this love be a free will thing, as in a light reflecting light, or darkness reflecting darkness.I call many Beloved as this is what they are to the Creator, and yet that is as far as I go with the quote intimacy of a thing, as I own no one or their love.-- thing is if love is not freely given, then why want it? Or is it really love at all? I have a special someone who calls me her twin, yet the depth of the meaning of this escaped me, as I just thought it was just more along the lines of a soul mate. Yet when the church shot me down out of the air for my inward understandings that were not congruent with the societal white picket fence of today's definition of said scripture- I seem =ed to have fallen in the branches of a dear one, who picked me up and put me on her horse/understanding which was mostly my understanding and carried me to her inn, and nursed me back to health as my thoughts had been fragmented, and I seemed to be no longer whole. In doing this she became an apple of my eye, and anything I could do to help her, it would be done -- in other words if all I had was a dime, then she too had that dime. Yet I have always tried to be one who would give, as it was my pleasure to do so. This one however is like the core of my inner circle, and yet I could not repay what she in her kindness did for me. The waking up in a whole other country, and smelling the atmosphere of the crispness of the air and the reality of the soil etc.all spiritual of course and not virtual reality.. This beautiful one, loved roses, I found out-- so as the days went on, that resonated within me-- I was going to ask her son if he would receive some money and on my behalf surprise his mother with these flowers as she is a flower/flow-er. Yet at that time she wrote me and asked for a little money to get some things that were needed --I was excited to be able to help as I had just sold my tractor, and four wheeler, as my dreams for the property I had purchased were made nonexistent from a so called husband. This made me able to give, not just the roses, but help in the time of need. I usually call these people an askhole, which I do not define that in the negative sense-- yet this one could have half of anything I had- I seemed to have a pure love for her that could not be explained, yet her friend had asked, when are you and Tina getting married? When she showed me this personal message, I was like we are married, as the married bed is the mind. Before I met her, I had heard within me swana, and I asked her what that meant, because of the her mentioning Batswana-- Her reply was that Tswana was their language, a language which I have no clue to the dialect, but was satisfied with the answer given me. Anyway it pleased me greatly to be a help. but mostly to give her something she loves, which were the roses, as this was special just for her, and the food would help her whole family. I guess I write this because from with in through the years I innerstood the true Father to be a Giver, and I wanted to be just like Him, a giver, reflecting light back to the one who is light. So she made our personal message room, a house, which with the words were full of beautiful children, so I thanked her for the bridal chamber as well as the house she had build that turned home-- anyway a particular day we had discussions, that caused a psycoenergetic something to happen which I term it that because I have no answers at the present what transpired. Seems something in me caused a burning from the loins to the head. and something busted out of me as if energy and as if it had went out to go what it was sent to do and did not return void of its sending-- kind of weird but like the, I will term this as a body orgasm, and yet no temple was defiled in the process, as it was like what went out of me, went to kiss the soul of another-- like a fusing, and not separated, yet not owned but cherished-- yet for the last few days I have sat and wondered what the fuck is wrong with me now? What did I do? Was it wrong? Why did it burst forth? Why could I not contain it? Either way there is something to kissing the soul of another, and what exactly that means, I have no words as she owes me nothing. Nonetheless it has spawned in me the fact that it was us who fell, the lucifers, who wanted this experience in life, which with out restoration is raised back up like the pole with which the Christ was raised in the tent/house- going from animal impulses to divine impulses, a raised awareness of all things and the senses amplified, as if seeing shapes, smelling colors, feeling aromas, and seeing sounds..So my deduction is there is either something wrong with me or this is how it should have been all along.